The mental illness where former slaves say get off my lawn
Picture this: It’s 1851, and Dr. Samuel A. Cartwright, fresh off his groundbreaking discovery of drapetomania, has stumbled upon another “totally legit” medical condition. Behold, Dysaesthesia aethiopica – the malady that explains why those pesky slaves just won’t work hard enough!
Cartwright, armed with his medical degree and a PhD in creative oppression, described this condition as affecting “both mind and body.” Symptoms included partial insensitivity of the skin and “so great a hebetude of the intellectual faculties, as to be like a person half asleep.” In other words, if your slave looks tired of your nonsense, it’s not because of the backbreaking labor – it’s a disease!
But fear not, plantation owners! Cartwright had a cure that would make even the Spanish Inquisition blush. His prescription? A “stimulating” treatment involving a warm bath, followed by a generous application of oil, which was then to be “slapped in with a broad leather strap.” Because nothing says “medical care” like a good old-fashioned beating!
The good doctor claimed this condition was “much more prevalent among free negroes living in clusters by themselves.” Apparently, freedom was a key risk factor for this dreadful affliction. Who knew that liberty could be so hazardous to one’s health?
But wait, there’s more! After this “course of treatment,” Cartwright assured slave owners that their property would “look grateful and thankful to the white man whose compulsory power… has restored his sensation and dispelled the mist that clouded his intellect.” Because nothing says “gratitude” like being forcibly “cured” of your desire for basic human dignity!
So, there you have it, folks. Dysaesthesia aethiopica: the “disease” that proved sometimes the real mental illness is thinking you can diagnose away the fundamental human drive for freedom and respect. Remember, if your slaves aren’t working hard enough, it’s not because of the inhumane conditions – it’s clearly a case of Dysaesthesia aethiopica. The cure? A healthy dose of 19th-century quackery, with a side of horrifying racism!